Passion and Inspiration

Sometimes I find myself bogged down in the workload. For example, at the moment we are working on two assignments, about to return to placement and in January we have a presentation and a biology exam. In the midst of this, I am also attending meetings in my capacity as set rep and trying to plan for Christmas, spend time with my family and friends and there just isn't enough hours in the week. Consequently I'm a little rundown at the moment, with cold after cold and a constant feeling of tiredness. So it's easy to wonder how I maintain my passion for midwifery, and to keep that light at the end of the tunnel to aim for.

I try to maintain my passion for midwifery through reading - I'm always interested in the use of techniques I've never seen in practice and that we're unlikely to be taught. For example, the use of water blisters to help with the pain in a back to back labour. If you've not heard of them before then have a read, it's really interesting. Something else I was reading about recently was a technique for dealing with shoulder dystocia where the mother is aided into a running start position which is explained here.

I also recently attended a water birth study day which re-ignited my passion for water birth and home birth. Prior to beginning the course, it was of course my own home water birth that inspired me to become a midwife and yet I am still to attend one myself. The study day reminded me of how to trust in women to be able to birth their babies without any intervention. It also highlighted to me the amount of fear there is surrounding home birth - from the health professionals as well as the women. Fortunately this isn't true of everyone but clearly a significant enough number for the percentage of women having a home birth to be extremely low. According to Birth Choice UK, just 2.39% of births in the UK were home births and in the area where I work just 2.2%, a figure which hasn't changed much in the past 10 years.

This week I was fortunate to be able to attend the RCM student midwives conference in Brighton. As well as the superb amount of freebies from all the stands that were there, I also had the opportunity to listen to some inspirational speakers. I was able to hear from other students, newly qualified midwives and midwives who had been working in the profession for a long time. If you ever get the chance to attend then I thoroughly recommend it. It's hard for me to sum up exactly how much you can gain from the experience. I'd also recommend any other conferences you can attend, such as the ARM conference or any other event where you might have the opportunity to hear such inspirational speakers.

So when I'm feeling the pressure of my workload and all I'm really doing is worrying about how I am going to get it all done, to the best of my ability, sometimes I just take some time out to remind myself why I am doing it and I then find I can focus better on my work. Alternatively I also have times when I just have to push on, push past the point where I feel everything I am writing is rubbish, to the point where it begins to make sense. Trust me, it does happen sometimes.

If you haven't done so already, can you please sign the petition for more midwives!
http://www.rcm.org.uk/college/campaigns-events/protect-maternity-services/

Happy New Year!

A new year is often synonymous with new beginnings and hope, happiness and celebration. I am looking forward to catching my first baby this year, hopefully soon and then becoming a second year student midwife in May. I have hopes of weight loss and being healthier. I have many celebrations to look forward to - two ruby weddings, two 65th birthdays, an 18th and a 21st birthday, two 40th birthdays and a wedding to go to.

However for many the new year can be tinged with sadness - for me it's the beginning of another year without my brother. Today I visited my brothers tree:

I love the cemetery where my brother's tree is. There are always people visiting, there are always fresh flowers and it's a lovely place to spend a contemplative moment. Whilst there I often wander to look at gravestones, or memorials, particular when there is a new one crop up. Today I wandered to spend a moment in the baby and children area - such sorrow and such pain and yet such beauty. The babies gone but not forgotten, still bought gifts though they are not here to enjoy them. The sadness of losing a child seems somehow greater than losing an adult and I'm not about to debate how true that is. Truth is loss of any kind is painful and times of celebration can highlight their absence.

Today I shall light a candle for my brother, but I shall also think of others who have lost loved ones and remember them too. Whilst we think of them, and talk about them, they are never forgotten. Don't ever be afraid to talk to someone about their lost loved one....it helps to know someone else remembers and cares.

Happy new year to you all. I hope 2011 brings you all happiness and laughter, good health and maybe just a smidge of wealth too.

3 babies

Two weeks off for Christmas and some time to indulge in my hobbies. One of the first things I did was to photograph my friends babies....something I'd been looking forward to all year. Despite there being a month between my friends due dates, the babies actually arrived 9 days apart. 

First born was Alice - born at home as planned on the 25th November. 

Then came Siena on the 30th November - who was born by Caesarean Section, not quite as originally planned as Mum had hoped for a VBAC at home. However as her amniotic fluid began to leak at 34 weeks, it was decided that the safest option was a planned Caesarean. 

And finally came Sam's baby, who arrived in hospital on the 4th December. I think the world of Facebook held it's breath awaiting the arrival. All of Sam's friends knew that Sam was in labour. We'd witnessed the snow updates, and the worries about whether or not a midwife would make it to her house for the homebirth she had planned. We then witnessed the updates about her contractions beginning and then her leaving to go to the hospital. I've talked about Sam in a previous post and how she lost her first son Malachi. Sam was desperate to have a little boy, and we were all praying for a little boy for her.  When her updates went quiet, we knew that there was a good chance that the baby had been born. Finally the update that we had all been waiting for....her family was complete and baby Bauer had been born. As it turned out, being in hospital rather than at home, had been the very best thing for them. 

Two days before Christmas I took the opportunity to photograph the three of them together and I felt so very very lucky.